This is a bit of a silly one, really, but I do think the general profusion of the idea that people can't be responsible for themselves is quite damaging.  All the risk assessment bollocks and arse-covering that is so institutionalised now just robs people of their common sense, breeds laziness, the idea that everything must be someone else's fault, that someone else will sort it out, that if crap things happen there must be a reason for it, and someone must be responsible, and that person must be 'brought to justice'.  Usually by the 'victim' receiving a huge wad of cash. I'm detracting from the point here really, but hand-in-hand with this culture of capitalising on accidents is an idea that people therefore need to be protected and told what to do so that it can't rebound on whoever it is that is doing the telling that people 'weren't informed'.  The staple response now is 'I wasn't told' rather than 'I didn't think of that', which leads to more and more idiocy, and somehow it being okay to actually blame other people for one's own stupidity.

This poem isn't about that.. well, it's about one aspect of the culture that breeds this kind of ridiculous nannying, but in my mind it's all part and parcel of the same thing really...  I happen to think it's a very poor poem, in 'poetic' terms - it's certainly an idea poem rather than a sound poem, or an image poem, or an emotive piece, and as such is a bit out of line with what I usually write, and in fact I didn't write most of it, just rephrased First Great Western's helpful advice.  Still, it took less then five minutes of my time and I quite like the idea, even if it isn't very pleasingly presented.

Please Do Not Remove

Please read these instructions,

Which are provided for your safety

In the event of an emergency:

In the event of an emergency,

Stay on the train.

Stay on the train

Because it is the safest place

In the event of an emergency.

This is not adequate advice for life.

In the event of an emergency,

Unless you are on an actual train,

No rescue teams will come to save you –

And nor should they.